Thursday, July 22, 2010

Loving My Family & Home

I love taking care of my family and home. It is my life. It comes second only to my relationship with God. It's not always easy....it's not always fair. Over the past 10 years, God has revealed so much to me. He has taken me from a selfish wife to a wife who truly desires to serve her family! I will be forever grateful!

When Chris and I got married, we were so young...I, 19; He, 21. Although I truly loved Chris and wanted him to be happy...at that time, I was in the mind-set that I was deserving of his constant praise and adoration. I wasn't really in the *servant* frame of mind. I cleaned and tried to take care of him...but I got easily upset when he didn't seem appreciative or attentive to *my* needs.
It took me years to let God do a serious work in me. I wanted control. I wanted to be in charge of me. Oh...I cringe at the selfish attitude that I possessed. As a woman of God...it is my job and life's mission to care for my husband, children and home. I am to be a servant....with a joyful and loving spirit. It is difficult to detach from self. But if you truly desire to be like Jesus and live your life for Him...then you must let go of self and start cheerfully focusing on others. This starts first with focusing on Him...for how can you know how to live if you don't *know* the Reason for life!?

Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value.
She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
~ Proverbs 31:11-12


Next, if you are married, the focus is on your husband. This may not be an easy thing...but it is absolutely a *must*. Your husband may leave dirty clothes on the floor, beside the hamper. He may leave his shoes on the floor in the living room. Maybe he doesn't read the Bible like you want him to...or isn't exactly who you want him to be. But it isn't our job to change our husbands. It *is* our job to pray for, encourage, love and take care of our husbands....even if they don't pray for, encourage, love or take care of us! When you married him...you did it for better or worse and for *life*. Make the absolute best of it. Be the *best* wife you can be! :) Let God work on your husband...you just keep on loving and caring for him!

Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
~ Proverbs 31:28

Your children come next. Caring for, loving, and training them up in the Lord is our responsibility. It's not the grandparent's job, not the babysitter's job, not the school's job, not the church's job....it is *ours*. God entrusts us with these beautiful creatures to raise up in love. Everything we do for them should be done in love...including discipline. We should be teaching them to have a servant's heart as well. It can be very difficult at times...children have different temperments, characters and personalities. I have shed many tears over the years...feeling that my mothering was sub-par and struggling when I didn't know the right way to handle a situation. Turning to our Father and how He parents us is the best way to learn how to be the best parents for our children.

She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
~ Proverbs 31:27

Creating a home that is a cozy and comfortable place for your family is also very important. Keeping things tidy and cared for can let your husband and children know that you work hard to keep a lovely and peaceful place for them to enjoy. But keep yourself in check...this doesn't mean scrubbing every inch of your house daily....or making a *perfectly* kept house more important than the people who live in it! Also keep your *attitude* in check. A pleasant, cheerful, and loving woman is someone that others will *want* to be around. :)
I am so very far from perfect...but I hope, in sharing my typical day with you, that I will be of encouragement to you! :)

She gets up while it is still dark;
~ Proverbs 31:15a

My day starts out anytime between 5-6am. My body naturally awakens at that time. I know this doesn't come naturally to some...but you *can* retrain your body...and that time in the morning is very valuable! Some days, I check email and such on the computer...then go downstairs to have breakfast, read my Bible and review my To-Do list for the day and any appointments in my planner.

I then will start Chris's coffee and make his lunch. I will then take a shower. Usually, by this time it is around 7 and my children are up. They feed the dogs while I wake Chris. Then I will get them breakfast. After sending Chris off to work with love...I will then sit and start decorating and recording a bit in my memory journal. Usually at least one (sometimes all) of the children will sit down at the table with me and color, practice writing their letters or words etc. My mom calls most mornings around 8...so I enjoy a few minutes of conversation with her each morning before starting my daily chores.


Then, while I begin cleaning...dishes, laundry, general pick-up, sweeping and vacuuming etc...the littles will go out and feed the sheep and chickens and then stay out to play while the weather is still cool.

Loads of laundry are washed and hung out to dry through the day...then brought back in, folded and put away!

I try to get my kitchen clean and neat each morning. A clean and nice smelling kitchen is such a joy to walk into. It is such a central place of the home.

Making sure all the beds are made each morning is something important to me, as well. A neat, made bed can make an even messy room appear tidier. :)

Once we begin our new year of homeschooling in August...I will get the house generally picked up each morning, early...and then after breakfast, we will spend the morning on our schoolwork. Then I will do a bit of deeper cleaning in the afternoon.

Most afternoons, we have a time of rest....not always a time of *sleep* but a time of rest and calm. Sometimes my littles will drift off to sleep and other times, not. Just as long as they have some time of rest after busy hours of play, cleaning, and (during the school year) schoolwork. Then it's time for preparing supper and making sure the house is neat and tidy for when Chris comes home....not because he requires it, but because I feel that preparing a comfortable place for him to relax after a long day at work shows him I love him! :)

At times, during the day, I will sit and knit. I have been working on many different things, but since they are gifts, I can't post about them right yet! :)

After supper, after making sure everyone is full and content, I will do dishes...then some evenings we'll spend time as a family, or each of us will work on projects we are doing, the kids will play etc. :) Around 8 or 9 at night...we'll tuck the children in and usually I will turn in, as well. Usually Chris rests downstairs in his chair, watching TV for a bit. I will lay in bed and read and pray. Usually, as I start to fall asleep, Chris will come up after showering and sit in a chair in our room and read a while before coming to bed. :)

That's a general idea of our days...although no two days are *exactly* alike. :) I pray, if you haven't before, that you will seek to serve your family with a cheerful spirit. :) I hope you find encouragement in this post and in your daily time with God. I want to stress the fact that I am definitely *not* perfect...but just wanted to share how I am striving to live to serve! :)

I feel as though I have so much more I would love to share with you...but alas, between the time it takes to type this as well as some difficulties with my computer ~ I have spent more time than I wanted to, already, here. So I will leave you with this, as is. :)
As always, I would love to hear your thoughts...whether by comment or email. Thank you for taking the time to stop and read and, if you do, share your thoughts with me! :)
You each are always a source of encouragement and blessing to me!

Warmly,
Katy :)
The LORD bless thee, and keep thee: The LORD make his face shine upon thee,
and be gracious unto thee: The LORD lift up his countenance upon thee, and give thee peace.
~Numbers 6:24-26

25 comments:

  1. Katy, your words on this post have hit home so much for me. I am in the process of getting more in touch with the Lord and his word and turning my life around. My children will now be homeschooled so getting things ready for that is important to me.

    I am also trying ever so hard with the Lord's help to be a more loving and caring mom and wife. I too wake early and spend some quiet time. I am now beginning to read in my bible and make time for talking with the Lord.

    Thank you for this post as it is so wonderful to know that there are so many others out there doing this walk in life.

    May God's Blessings be on you today and always sweet lady.

    Hugs,

    Anne

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  2. Thank you Katy. I *NEEDED* to read this post today.

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  3. Another wonderful post with so much meaning.

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  4. A beautiful, well-written post and SO true.

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  5. Another beautiful post:) I love the look of laundry on the line, so peaceful:)Enjoy the rest of the day!

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  6. Hi Katy,
    I just loved reading this post. It was just like you were looking into my life with hubby and our kiddos. I strive to be a *perfect* mother for our kids and soul mate for my hubby.

    Thanks for your encouragement and a look into your daily life. It was an inspiration for me to see that I am not alone with my learnings.

    Thanks,
    Nicki in WV

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  7. this is an amazing post. i would love to wake up at 5am everyday. i think having some alone time everyday is critical to being able to share love with others. you are the light.

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  8. Good words, Katy....I always have wanted and strive to have the same servant heart.....raised the boys at home and support my husband all I can....you are right, it isn't easy...but so rewarding....the thing that impressed me was when you said, we can't change our husbands but love and support them....

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  9. Katy,

    This was another awesome post! :)

    Melinda

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  10. Hi Katy ~ I always enjoy reading your uplifting posts! Thanks for sharing your day and walk with the lord ~ very refreshing!
    Take Care~
    Betty

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  11. Thank you, Katy, for this wonderful post...you've touched on somethings that I have been dealing with...your words have truly spoken to my heart :)

    God bless,
    Kim

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  12. Katy~You hit the nail on the head once again for me.I have been struggling lately and praying to be a better wife and mother.I feel so blessed when I come to check your blog daily that you have it spelled out for me/Thanks alot
    Jamie

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  13. Katy,

    I absolutely needed to "hear" this today. I feel I am now where you were when you were first married. I truly need a change of mind, to a servant's mind. I was just talking to my mother about this topic yesterday and it's though God spoke through you and your blog to tell me, "Wake-up!". Thank you so much. Your blog means soooo much to me, and I truly feel God is doing a great work through you. BTW, could you tell me how you managed to keep a tidy house when your children were tiny? I have a 2 year old and a 6 month old. It seems near impossible. I feel all I do all day long is wipe noses and kiss boo boos. That is important mind you, but I still need a clean house!

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  14. When my girls were dating and picking a mate, I told them,"Don't choose someone that you want to make you happy-Choose someone that you feel is such a great guy and so good that you just can't stand to think of him having anything less than a great wife" Then marry him and be that "great wife". Not perfect but great because you are just what he needs.

    Then you will be happy because if he is a good man, he will be so appreciative of his "great wife" he will try to be a great husband.

    Thanks for your post today!

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  15. Awesome post! I too was married very young and i still have a selfish heart! I want my hubby and kids to say,"WOW,look what you did!" and that is terrible!! I know that it is possible to turn things around in my heart! I have good days and bad! Thanks for the encouragement as always! Will DEFINITELY be working on this!

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  16. Katy,

    Thank you for a wonderful post. You inspire me so much! I can read this post everyday.

    Tina

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  17. Katy, I couldn't have read your post at a better time. All day I was struggling with a lack of motivation for housekeeping - everything I did today wasn't done in the right attitude. I wanted appreciation. I even thought of writing something along the lines of "I cleaned the whole kitchen today" on the white board on the refrigerator. Silly and selfish, huh?

    I'm 19 and I'm not ready for marriage yet (though I do desperately want to get married). If or when I marry, I want to be the type of wife and mother you are - a Proverbs 31 woman. You are an inspiration to me... thank you for blogging about your day and enjoying the simple things in life.

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  18. Thank you for this wonderful post. It is so nice reading your words and feeling connected to someone who realized the importance of raising our children and being there for our husbands. The world is going by so quickly, we all need to slow down and realize what's important and spend more time not only with our families, but with God. Thank you Katy, I needed this post to reflect upon today. ;-}

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  19. Katy, It's funny, but this is what the Lord has been teaching me this last two weeks. He's been bringing revival to our marriage and home. It's not that I haven't always felt that they were my God-given priority..and I love hubby and kids with all my heart..but the Lord wanted to do a better work. I was still selfish in ways I didn't know I was.

    I've been posting about it a little..but the new things the Lord has showed me..especially about loving Hubby and my home are almost more than I can describe! Pray I will have the courage to SAY it all. :o)

    Hugs,
    Donna @ Comin' Home
    www.thehomemakingarts.blogspot.com

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  20. lovely. Thanks for the refreshment this morning. It was funny. I have been on a trip, and had to check your blog posts on my phone. :) Have a great weekend!
    christina

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  21. Katy, Sounds like you have a very organized day and I know that is important when you home school. Just remember that things change as the kids get older and be careful not to be so scheduled that you forget to keep an eye on the changes your children may need.
    I am on my last year of Home schooling and then I will be done forever...my only regret has been that I didn't take 2 hours each afternoon to just sit and spend that time with the girls laughing, talking, having tea, reading books stitching or playing games. time is so precious and so are the children do be labored to a schedule so tightly that you miss the joy. Blessings, Dianntha

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  22. I don't know if you realize how much God speaks to me through your blogs. The timing of this is scary!! I know you wrote this previously....but I am just reading it now....right when I needed to!! Thank you!!!

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  23. What a beautiful post Katy, I loved this so much. Full of wise and loving advice...thank you. :)

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  24. what a lovely post..i love hearing about your day..
    i love a tidy home...

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I am always so grateful to read your comments! I thank you for the time you took to visit and share your thoughts with me. :o)
May you enter as a stranger and leave as a friend!
Warmly, Katy