Thursday, January 24, 2008

A Desire To Serve....accompanied by confusion...

I want to be as pleasing to God as I possibly can be. I know I falter in many ways...however...I have been trying and praying and doing the best i possibly can. However...I just feel so confused and unsure about things. I have read many blogs that say women should be dressed modestly. I agree. However....these blogs also say that even jeans are inappropriate! If I had a thin and petite body....I would be thrilled to wear dresses..but I do not..and I would honestly look ridiculous in a dress. I don't wear revealing clothing and I have always thought I dress modest enough. And now I cringe at the thought of displeasing God because I am not being "feminine" enough. I feel so confused.
I usually wear a pair of jeans and a shirt. I don't wear tight fitting clothes or skimpy things. I have always thought of this as being modestly dressed. I want the Lord to be pleased with me....and now I just am so not sure of what to do?
And then the whole homeschooling issue. I have prayed a lot about it and am still going back and forth on it! I just have NO idea what He wants us to do. I want to do what He wants....and I can't decide on which way is better?

I know that our Lord is not a God of confusion...but I just feel so lost on it all. So...if I may...I ask for prayer. I would like a clear head about all the things I feel so confused about and His guidance and direction on things. Thank you so much. I would really appreciate it.

Also...any input you have..i would love to hear. Thank you!!!


  1. no offense to anyone... but i don't believe God requires women to wear dresses or skirts to be modest. i think if you are wearing clothes that make you feel comfortable and aren't revealing, there's no problem with that. it is "man's" idea of wearing skirts and dresses to be modest. as long as we are conscious of the people (espec. men) around us and are aware that if we wear tight-fitting or revealing clothing... we aren't being fair to them. it is their nature to look! so don't feel bad about what you wear! i think you dress fine and you take care of yourself. thats what really matters.
    also--homeschooling is great! but just remember your sanity! i think you would really need to come up with a structured plan to use (as far as where the kids sit to do their work, etc...) so that it doesn't turn into chaos. it's been done successfully many times! i have no doubt that you could do it! i will be praying for you...

  2. Wow, you have a lot going through your head! I'll offer my opinion and my prayers, ok.

    First, I am definitely a modest person. I think it is a very important aspect to being a good daughter of God. However, I don't think that jeans are immodest, unless they're tight or a low-rise where your tummy is showing. I believe that the Lord is pleased with who you are in your heart and what your actions are, not nearly as concerned as what you wear, So long as it is modest. One of the definitions for modest is: quiet and humble in appearance. I think jeans and a t-shirt can be quiet and humble. I don't think you have to be in a dress for the Lord to be pleased with you.

    Secondly, I also believe that sometimes when we pray to the Lord for answers and there's still a lot of confusion on our part, that that is the answer. Confusion and uncertainty aren't from the Lord, just like you said. So to me that would mean that maybe that's not what the Lord wants you to do right now. Maybe the confusion you're feeling is the Lord telling you that your answer is no.

    I don't know if that's very helpful. You'll be in my prayers.

  3. Thanks so much devon and cindy...i truly appreciate it and have drawn comfort and help from your opinions!!! Thank you thank you!!! xoxo

  4. I will be praying for you Katie.I know how you feel,because I struggle wuth the same issues.I have three children.Two boys,7 and 9,and a girl who is 4.The boys go to public school.I don`t like it,but I also know my own limitations.Right now,I canot teach them at home.I pray for them daily as they are out in the world.I think it`s a good idea to explaine to them as they get older the things they will be learning in school about evolution and things like sexual education.The Gospel needs to be enforced in our homes,and we need to have daily devotions with our children before they leave each dy.Pleae pray for me about these things as well.Also,we don`t know how god is going to use our children.Maybe they can witness to other children.
    Also,I am a size 18/20,so I know how you feel about dresses.I have been wanting to wear more skirts.Try some of the cute long jean skirts with a baggy nice shirt.That`s what I plan on doing.Don`t stess over it though.God knows the intent of your heart and He knows you and I don`t wear pants to rebel against Him.We love Him,and He loves us!
    Sorry this is so long.It seems as though our struggles are simmilar though.If you would like to e-mail me,I`d love to hear from you!

  5. Thank you soo soo much! I really appreciate it and will be in prayer for you as well! I feel truly blessed that I have met such great people on through blogs.

  6. Katy,
    I have also struggled in the same area as far as clothing goes. I could wear dress or skirts and I am not petite either, however, I am just not sure. Is there a place in the bible where is specifically says dresses or skirts? I am not sure. I am like you and wear jeans and t-shirts, not tight fitting and showing no skin (except arms). I know that God knows my heart. I will be praying for you as you wrestle this around in your mind. As far as homeschooling, you will know if it is for you. You are not a bad mother for not homeschooling and when or if it is time to bring them home, God will touch your heart and there will be no doubt in your mind.


  7. Kerri...thank you so much for the words of assurance and all. it has brought such peace to me. i am so thankful for my friends! xoxo

  8. Hi Katy,

    I think women can dress beautifully, attractively and modestly in pants or skirts -- and can dress hideously and immodestly in either too. God knows your heart and loves you; it is not for other people to do so.

    I worry when we Christian women set 'rules' for ourselves and judge others for not conforming; the thing that makes Christianity special is that we are saved by grace not works.

    I don't homeschool and until I began reading American blogs (I'm an Aussie) I had no idea it was considered a badge of faith to do so.

    The Christian parents I know become actively involved in their local schools, open their homes to non-Christian children and their families, invite them to church, and overall try to bless their communities. I feel our school communities are only as great as we make them.

    I became a Christian at high school because a Christian family welcomed me into their home. If those children had been homeschooled I might never have had the opportunity to get to know them and their friends.

    Homeschooling has many benefits to many children from what I have read, but I have very little direct experience of it amongst my own friends.


  9. Hi! I stumbled across your blog today and I really like what I've read so far.

    Like the others above, I think God knows what is in your heart regarding modest dress. As long as you are not intentionally wearing revealing clothing, I think God will be more concerned with what's on the inside, not your choice of clothing. I've given some thought to the skirt thing myself, and this is what I've come to think. I feel like me changing to skirts now would be more of a statement that I'd be constantly explaining to friends and family, which would defeat the whole purpose of dressing modestly to not draw attention to myself. Does that make sense? (LOL, nice of my first comment here to be rambling, don't you think?)

  10. I've always worn jeans and tshirts or knit shirts. I am overweight and just don't think I look good in dresses, nor feel comfortable. I feel like I'm wearing a tent in them LOL. I know dh would LOVE to see me dressed up more often, but he too, is a jeans and tshirts man LOL. Now on the homeschooling thing...I never believed in it (in past years). But recently have also contemplated homeschooling, just because our schools here are SO bad. My 6 y.o. son is autistic and they won't even give him services through the school! We're so frustrated. On the other hand, my sanity is important to me, as I have very little left LOL. Raising 4 kids and having 2 jobs is hard enough on me. I think I would just go over the edge if I homeschooled. Do what is right for YOU and your family. and in your heart, you know what is best. xoxoxo

  11. Hi, Katy! I know how you are feeling. I am sure a lot of us praying folks know what it is like to be unsure at times about what decisions to make because we want to please our God. Before Mike & I even were "expecting" Amelia, we had made the decision to homeschool. It just seems right for us. However, I prayed long and hard about it, and continue to do so. Granted, she is only 9 months old now, but I like to plan ahead :o). Anyway, at first, I was worried that my decision to homeschool was a selfish one. So many people disagree with it, and I was hearing that from everywhere. But then I realized something: I am raising my children for God, not for this world. Now, I am by no means saying that if someone (including myself) does not homeschool that her child is not being raised for God. I myself was brought up in the public school system. And Amelia is so young, a lot could change between now and then. I just think that for myself and my family, homeschooling is the right answer. And I got to that answer and feeling happy and confident with my decision after some honest and open talks with God. I asked him to give me a pure heart so that I could hear and know in my heart His voice. I would be happy to pray for you about this, Katy, and that God will guide you.


I am always so grateful to read your comments! I thank you for the time you took to visit and share your thoughts with me. :o)
May you enter as a stranger and leave as a friend!
Warmly, Katy